War of the Dimensions - Part I: Shadow

[forca]

AU, X-over, PG-13 for some violence in later chapters

 

A/N: This is the first part of an eight part series, the main part of which will only be four books long. The other four are an in-between companion series that kind of fills in a gap in the timeline. This is also a rewrite of a previous story that I had been working on. I decided I did not like the way the story was progressing and began the reconstruction process. Elements in the prologue may be recognizable from various places - movies, books, etc. - but I'm afraid you'll just have to wait and read on before you really know what is going on.

 

On a final note, this story is in fact a crossover of many, many things. The only two I will give you to start with are: Star Wars and Lord of the Rings. At the beginning of the next book I will most likely expand on this.

 

Yeah, that's pretty much it. Please review, I need to know how I'm doing.

 

 

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Prologue

 

"You have unleashed a power far greater than you. You shall live to regret it."

 

"I warned you not to touch her."

 

"You are hereby expelled from the Jedi Order."

 

"I want these creatures out of Gondor. I don't care if you have to kill every one of them, I want them out."

 

"Go. Go back to New York. I won't let you stay here if it means I might lose you again."

 

"You killed him. You killed Lar Gand, and now I'm going to kill you!"

 

"Please! Please, it was an accident. You know that wasn't me..."

 

"I don't need a sidekick, all right? I've lost two already, and that's two too many for me."

 

"You all right, kid?"

 

"Take it easy! It's just a training exercise."

 

"Everybody down!"

 

"I can't believe it. I trusted you!"

 

"I'm sorry, Rachel. But I can't do this on my own. I need help."

 

"You'd better be thinking of where your allegiances lie."

 

"The Great Council finds you both guilty of high treason against his majesty, the King of Zolan, and his people."

 

"I want my son back, Kenobi! And I don't care who I go through to get him!"

 

"You wanna sit this one out?"

 

"Sorry is just not gonna cut it this time, Bruce..."

 

"Don't leave me. I don't want to die alone..."

 

"Please, you have to do something!"

 

"...Stop me. You have to stop me. I can't stop myself! Just... just kill me. Right now. Please. Jean... Kill me..."

 

"That's it. It's over."

 

Odd. It's been so long I'd nearly forgotten. But... No, that's not right. Nothing is right anymore.

 

Well, the war is over, at any rate. How long has it been? Five years? Ten? Twenty? I can't remember...

 

But I do remember everything that happened, every minute little detail. The smell of smoke on Bruce's clothes when he got into a fight with Scott. The smell of blood when he got into a fight with Marie (She broke his jaw that day). The tears on Vic's face when Rachel died (the second time). The color of the sky the day of my wedding. The song we sang at my sister's funeral. The way Kara looked at me when I got between her and Jim. The warm glow of a fire that night we spent in the cave. The dullness that seemed to linger in Tim's eyes after the sonic explosion took out Command Central. The feel of a kiss. The sound of fluttering wings and galloping hooves. A city by night. A secret meeting in a moonlit forest clearing. The thrill of a battle. The agony of defeat. The bitterness of death. The height of hope. The depths of despair.

 

And it all started when I was fifteen. Young, ambitious... Normal. I wasn't anyone special. And then...

 

...And then my life got turned upside-down.

 

My name is Forca. I was the Commander of the Alliance forces in the War of the Dimensions. And this is my story.

Edited January 8, 2007 by Guest

[Tiana Calthye]

WELCOME TO JEDI.NET FANFIC! (glomps) You joinded!

 

I approve this fanfic. I've read a bit further in on it. Since I speak as a critic on Jedi.net, that's a good thing. Lol. As I said before, I like the mystical nature of the beginning here... the jam of quoteses (okay, so I understand some of them...)

 

I've enjoyed this story.

 

PS: Return of the Shadow's on ff.net, I think... you might want to edit that out.

[Ethro Brealis]

Well, this certainly looks intrigueing. I'll be keeping an eye on it. Welcome to Jedi.net.

[jedi_master_gimpy]

Looks like an interesting fic to be sure, forca. I was able to catch some of the references, but certainly not all. Welcome (back?) to Jnet!

[Jidai Geki]

With just this to go on at the moment, it's very confusing. Hopefully the next portion will lend some context to this opening.

[forca]

WELCOME TO JEDI.NET FANFIC! (glomps) You joinded!

 

I approve this fanfic. I've read a bit further in on it. Since I speak as a critic on Jedi.net, that's a good thing. Lol. As I said before, I like the mystical nature of the beginning here... the jam of quoteses (okay, so I understand some of them...)

 

I've enjoyed this story.

 

PS: Return of the Shadow's on ff.net, I think... you might want to edit that out.

 

EEK! What would I do without you?! Thank you! And you understand some of the quotes, do you? We'll see...

 

Well, this certainly looks intrigueing. I'll be keeping an eye on it. Welcome to Jedi.net.

 

Glad you think so. Hope you enjoy the rest of it!

 

Looks like an interesting fic to be sure, forca. I was able to catch some of the references, but certainly not all. Welcome (back?) to Jnet!

 

(grin) Thanks. And sorry for the mix-up. I kinda just copied the story from the post I made on ME:I, where I had posted the original story. But this is, in fact, my first time on Jedi.net.

 

With just this to go on at the moment, it's very confusing. Hopefully the next portion will lend some context to this opening.

 

Yes, well, I'm not sure just how much context this chapter will lend, but hopefully the pieces will fall into place fast enough to ease your concerns.

 

Thanks for such a great welcome! And thank you so much for reading! Here is the first chapter!

 

Name Note: Lustë and Forca are the same person.

 

 

 

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Chapter 1: Lustë

 

The sun rose bright and beautiful over Ephel Duath and touched the lands below with its shining rays, setting the Anduin ablaze in brilliant red and gold flame. A single lone figure sat at the foot of Emyn Arnen and watched as Arien once again began her long journey across the sky to the West, bearing with her Anar the Fire-Golden of Laurelin, the last fruit of the great Tree of Valinor.

 

Lustë leaned forward, pushing herself away from the rocky outcropping, and watched listlessly as the day began. Her horse, Roccomorë, grazed farther up the hill, within earshot of his mistress should she call for him. But she did not just yet. Instead she sat, chin in hand, watching the great citadel of Minas Tirith below begin to bustle with morning activity. Having no one better to talk to, she addressed the creature behind her.

 

"Another day, Roc," she said. The great beast continued with his meal, taking no heed of her words. "Shall we see if the night has changed his majesty's mind? Or do we forget about Elessar and continue on our way?" An indifferent snort was all the response she received. Her gaze traveled up the great tower to its summit, sparkling in the morning light. "After all," she continued thoughtfully, "he has refused to listen to my warnings for a full week now. It is time I got back to my own world. Or, rather, the other world. 'Tisn't quite mine. Either way, they are all going to be worrying about me. Besides, if Gondor does fall, it will be his own fault for not listening to me. Right?"

 

Still, Roccomorë would give no sign that he heard a single word and continued grazing. Lustë continued to gaze at the tower as if she could not take her eyes off of it. "Rowena told me that I had to at least try, and I did try," she whispered to herself.

 

"But not hard enough." The voice behind her broke her trance. She turned to see a woman standing with Roccomorë, stroking him gently and also gazing at the tower. "You must speak with Elessar one last time, Sandra. The darkness must be stopped."

 

"Rowena!" Lustë rose to her feet and approached the woman, looking for all the world like she had failed some great, important task. "I have tried to warn King Elessar, but he will not listen."

 

"You have spoken to Galadriel of Lorién? And Éomer of Rohan?"

 

"Yes. Both said I would have any help they could provide."

 

"Good. Still, Gondor is closest to danger, and therefore must be prepared. You must convince Elessar of this."

 

"But I have done everything within my power, and still he does not listen."

 

"Then you must try something outside your power. For two years I have been training you, Sandra, and still you cannot think outside the box?" Rowena paused a moment and produced from her pocket a small sapphire set in a gold ring. "I also have spoken with Galadriel, and she bade me give you this."

 

Lustë took the ring and examined it curiously. "What is it for?" she asked.

 

"It is for many things. But mainly, it is for you to traverse the Dimensions at will. This is how you shall build your army."

 

"What does this have to do with convincing Elessar that I'm telling the truth?"

 

Rowena turned to Roccomorë and gave him a final pat on the neck. "You're a smart girl, Sandra," she said. "You'll think of something.”

[Tiana Calthye]

EEK! What would I do without you?! Thank you! And you understand some of the quotes, do you? We'll see...

 

XD.

 

Yes, yes, I do. Assuming that, like TDE is compared to LotG and Paint Wars, you've altered things, expanded, AND improved... I still know way more than anyone else on here as to your goals with this story. Y'know, like, the rough idea of the characters and many more of the universes you're using for this. And I've read the original. (hey, you read LotG too... ugh.)

 

I've already reviewed this chapter on MEI. Nothing really to say, bar ranting about the fact that you do make Forca seem like a bit of a Sue at first (when I'm quite aware she's a balanced character no worse than Talnaver). I'm really glad you took the time to add in the correct accent symbols. It adds to the realism of Middle-earth.

[Jidai Geki]

If there's one thing I'll say at the moment, it's that the modern dialogue interspersed with the LotR-speak is VERY incongruous. Phrases like "right?" and "think outside the box" just do not sit well in this kind of setting. It's your story, so of course you can write whatever dialogue you want, but I just don't think it works very well.

[jedi_master_gimpy]

Hmm, interesting start.

 

Looks like Lustë isn't from Middle-earth, and I would say Rowena isn't as well. In fact, with Rowena's easy ability to "traverse the Dimensions at will" (at least I'm guessing that's what she's doing with appearing and disappearing). I believe the only time I have actually heard the name Rowena is in "Ivanhoe," but I doubt you're using that as a "universe." Like Jidai Geki noted, there's a few phrases of hers that sound slightly odd - I'm not sure if this is because of the clash between where she's from and Middle-earth, although most of what she says fits in there.

 

Interesting concept, as you have begun to introduce it - gathering an army against this darkness from multiple "realities," for lack of a better word. Is the evil also going to be a conglomeration of these places, then? I find it surprising that Aragorn isn't paying more attention to these warnings, knowing his character.

[forca]

Yes, yes, I do. Assuming that, like TDE is compared to LotG and Paint Wars, you've altered things, expanded, AND improved... I still know way more than anyone else on here as to your goals with this story. Y'know, like, the rough idea of the characters and many more of the universes you're using for this. And I've read the original. (hey, you read LotG too... ugh.)

 

I've already reviewed this chapter on MEI. Nothing really to say, bar ranting about the fact that you do make Forca seem like a bit of a Sue at first (when I'm quite aware she's a balanced character no worse than Talnaver). I'm really glad you took the time to add in the correct accent symbols. It adds to the realism of Middle-earth.

 

Yes, I suppose you do know quite a lot about this story. Probably still not more than Foral knows, though. I tend to tell him just about everything (though I'm still trying to keep some things secret!). And, yes, the original was absolutely horrid!

 

As for the whole Sue thing, it's going to take a bit to get more into her character, since most of her non-Sueness is later in the story (the parts I have most recently and extensively developed), rather than earlier (the parts that never really got a revamp). And I am glad that you appreciate all my hard work in researching accent symbols and spelling and such.

 

If there's one thing I'll say at the moment, it's that the modern dialogue interspersed with the LotR-speak is VERY incongruous. Phrases like "right?" and "think outside the box" just do not sit well in this kind of setting. It's your story, so of course you can write whatever dialogue you want, but I just don't think it works very well.

 

It's not a LotR story, and that is where you are having trouble putting the two together. It is a crossover. These characters do not belong in this Dimension, and being in another Dimension changes nothing about you - not your personality, or your abilities, powers, skills - as she is about to find out. It'll make more sense later, I hope...

 

Hmm, interesting start.

 

Looks like Lustë isn't from Middle-earth, and I would say Rowena isn't as well. In fact, with Rowena's easy ability to "traverse the Dimensions at will" (at least I'm guessing that's what she's doing with appearing and disappearing). I believe the only time I have actually heard the name Rowena is in "Ivanhoe," but I doubt you're using that as a "universe." Like Jidai Geki noted, there's a few phrases of hers that sound slightly odd - I'm not sure if this is because of the clash between where she's from and Middle-earth, although most of what she says fits in there.

 

Interesting concept, as you have begun to introduce it - gathering an army against this darkness from multiple "realities," for lack of a better word. Is the evil also going to be a conglomeration of these places, then? I find it surprising that Aragorn isn't paying more attention to these warnings, knowing his character.

 

More is explained in this chapter. I am so glad that you are enjoying this, and I am pleasantly surprised that you are grasping so much of the subcontext of this story!

 

Rowena is, in fact, an original character, and we will be learning more about her in due time. For now, suffice it to know that she doesn't really belong in any of the Dimensions (of which, if you didn't already know, there are four).

 

And now, we move on to the next chapter, in which I introduce a new character, one that I quite enjoyed playing around with, and of whom we will see much more in coming chapters.

 

 

Name Note: Roccomorë is Quenya. It means "Black Horse".

 

Chapter 2: Blackash

 

”œPlease, just listen to me!”

[jedi_master_gimpy]

More is explained in this chapter. I am so glad that you are enjoying this, and I am pleasantly surprised that you are grasping so much of the subcontext of this story!

Lol, probably comes from reading so many of Tiana's fics. I've gotten very good at latching onto details.

 

Rowena is, in fact, an original character, and we will be learning more about her in due time. For now, suffice it to know that she doesn't really belong in any of the Dimensions (of which, if you didn't already know, there are four).

Four, eh? Well that will certainly help put it together. I easily identified SW and LotR, obviously. I guessed X-men as a possible third, although I'm not really sure.

 

Anywho, as to Chapter 2:

Again, I'm not quite sure if Aragorn is quite in character as I would expect him. Although I suppose many years of peace under his reign would make him hard-put in some ways to expect/believe in more enemies, perhaps. Eh, I suppose I should mention...I enjoy reading stories and will usually comment and things I really like about them, questions, etc...but also things that I wasn't sure about. It's all meant constructively.

 

”œPreparations will be made to defend our city against attacks from the East. Just tell me exactly what we need be on guard against.”

[Tiana Calthye]

More is explained in this chapter. I am so glad that you are enjoying this, and I am pleasantly surprised that you are grasping so much of the subcontext of this story!

Lol, probably comes from reading so many of Tiana's fics. I've gotten very good at latching onto details.

 

Lol to both. Gimpy's amazing on picking up details. Probably from reading too much of my work, yeah.

 

I was Forca's original beta reader. There are similarities. We used to co-write for a while, so... heh. I'm quite happy to see she's rewriting it without so much influence from my work.

 

Anyways. I thought Aragorn's dialogue was a bit out of character, but he's hard to write. No worries there...

 

Sitting beneath a tree was a young man in his early twenties, tall and well built with a shock of sandy-blonde hair. He observed her calmly with crystal-blue eyes that told a world of stories, most of which were probably exaggerated to begin with. He was dressed completely in black.

 

I really enjoyed this description. Just the "he was dressed completely in black" totally added to the end, and his eyes are facinating.

 

”œYou're rather long-winded for a villain. Are you sure you aren't just a misplaced hero?”

[forca]

More is explained in this chapter. I am so glad that you are enjoying this, and I am pleasantly surprised that you are grasping so much of the subcontext of this story!

 

Lol, probably comes from reading so many of Tiana's fics. I've gotten very good at latching onto details.

 

Rowena is, in fact, an original character, and we will be learning more about her in due time. For now, suffice it to know that she doesn't really belong in any of the Dimensions (of which, if you didn't already know, there are four).

 

Four, eh? Well that will certainly help put it together. I easily identified SW and LotR, obviously. I guessed X-men as a possible third, although I'm not really sure.

 

Anywho, as to Chapter 2:

Again, I'm not quite sure if Aragorn is quite in character as I would expect him. Although I suppose many years of peace under his reign would make him hard-put in some ways to expect/believe in more enemies, perhaps. Eh, I suppose I should mention...I enjoy reading stories and will usually comment and things I really like about them, questions, etc...but also things that I wasn't sure about. It's all meant constructively.

 

”œPreparations will be made to defend our city against attacks from the East. Just tell me exactly what we need be on guard against.”

[jedi_master_gimpy]

Slowly, her thoughts drifted back to her home in the Second Dimension. I wonder if they miss me?

I'm inferring that this means she needs to think of the place she wishes to go to for it to work. The whole ring thing reminds me vaguely of The Magician's Nephew, although those rings of course act immediately upon contact.

 

”œYou are going back to Coruscant to finish your training. But be mindful. It was hard enough to convince the Jedi to take you on as a student.

So Sandra/Forca is a Jedi student who was probably taken to the Jedi Order late. Seems to imply that her longest block of time/recent memory/most familiarity is with the SW dimension, but doesn't mean that it's her "home" dimension.

 

”œI'm sure I don't know. But I do know that you came back in time to find your parents, and ended up in an alternate reality where your father died at the hands of the woman he so desperately loved. The redhead in that photograph of yours, I believe.”

[forca]

Slowly, her thoughts drifted back to her home in the Second Dimension. I wonder if they miss me?

I'm inferring that this means she needs to think of the place she wishes to go to for it to work. The whole ring thing reminds me vaguely of The Magician's Nephew, although those rings of course act immediately upon contact.

 

Yes, your assumption was correct. And I suppose it could be seen as similar to Magician's Nephew, but it wasn't particularly what I had in mind.

 

”œYou are going back to Coruscant to finish your training. But be mindful. It was hard enough to convince the Jedi to take you on as a student.

So Sandra/Forca is a Jedi student who was probably taken to the Jedi Order late. Seems to imply that her longest block of time/recent memory/most familiarity is with the SW dimension, but doesn't mean that it's her "home" dimension.

 

Very good. It is indeed where she lives currently, but not where she is from.

 

”œI'm sure I don't know. But I do know that you came back in time to find your parents, and ended up in an alternate reality where your father died at the hands of the woman he so desperately loved. The redhead in that photograph of yours, I believe.”

[Ethro Brealis]

Hey, I'm sorry not to have a review (I'll try to do one later) but because of time constraints, for now I'll just drop in to say I am still reading this. Keep it up, forca.

[Tiana Calthye]

Personally?

 

I don't think they're going to just expell someone from the Order like that. Snap? No. That's my biggest critique for this update. It happened too fast. I can understand the need to have someone expelled from the Order for the sake of a plot device (....I've done it myself......), but never that easily.

 

Other than that, good update. You're improving your dialogue. It flowed quite well.

 

I'd review better, but I have to go right now.[/img]

[forca]

Hey, I'm sorry not to have a review (I'll try to do one later) but because of time constraints, for now I'll just drop in to say I am still reading this. Keep it up, forca.

 

That's perfectly fine. I'm just glad to see that you're still reading!

 

[/img]

 

??

 

Personally?

 

I don't think they're going to just expell someone from the Order like that. Snap? No. That's my biggest critique for this update. It happened too fast. I can understand the need to have someone expelled from the Order for the sake of a plot device (....I've done it myself......), but never that easily.

 

Other than that, good update. You're improving your dialogue. It flowed quite well.

 

I'd review better, but I have to go right now.

 

Well, my thinking was more along the lines that, since she was a very late comer, and only there by the special request of a trusted ally, and since her entire situation is so very extremely complicated... But you're right, it was too fast... Meh, too late to change now, I guess... And I'm glad you think my dialogue has improved. 'Cause sometimes I wonder if there's too much dialogue, and if it's all unrelated and boring and... such... And I'm just glad to see that you're still reading, so don't worry about short reviews!

 

Anywho... This chapter turned out to be rather long... and awkward... And... Just read it...

 

 

 

Chapter 5: The Keeper

 

 

Blackash stood still and silent next to the mound of fresh earth, staring at it as if that would bring the unfortunate girl back to life. This hadn't been what he'd signed up for. He'd only wanted revenge on his brother, not death for some innocent girl.

 

The photographs were left in her pocket. After he'd gotten a good look at them, of course. Xanatos would have left her to rot out in the open, but Blackash had ignored his orders to leave the body alone. He'd buried her, as he'd felt was proper.

 

”œI'm sorry, Rachel,”

[jedi_master_gimpy]

A slender figure broke the surface and dragged itself onto the bank beside him.

Reminds me yet more of The Magician's Nephew *grin*

 

”œWhy? Have you been thinking of becoming evil because you don't like me?”

[Anakin T Skywalker]

Awwww! It was being so cool! I wanted more! You set up a big mystery and then... left it...

 

 

NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Why am I always too late???

[Tiana Calthye]

But I'm almost positive this story was complete... hmmm. Check Fanfiction.net.

 

Dang, I miss my old Padawan. =( It's been years... alas.

 

(angsts) FORCA, WHERE BEETH THEE?

 

I should see if her email still works.