Amidala Skywalker Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Looks good LAP...very ambitious, but then, I'm sure something like that will be good for both you as a writer and for the site. BTW, Kheldar is on your list twice I think. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted March 1, 2009 Share Posted March 1, 2009 Excellent start! This is well-done. I'm interested to see what the celebration is about. It's also nice that you could use Ara-Lai talking to the guards as a way to introduce the characters on the Council, and it was extremely amusing to see who is on the Jedi Council. Nice start, and very well-written. Your hard work seems to be paying off! I'm looking forward to more! SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted April 3, 2009 Share Posted April 3, 2009 Nice update! I'm really enjoying the story you are weaving, and the way the characters are interacting with each other. You did a nice job with the relationship between AP and Krissi, and I think the scene was well done. Nice stuff. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted April 16, 2009 Share Posted April 16, 2009 Lurker!!! Hi Jai! Hope you're doing well! It's good to see you every now and then! SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted April 23, 2009 Share Posted April 23, 2009 That and you just like the ego boost it gives you, right? In a year's time, I'm sure it'll be okay to unsticky this thread. Probably. BTW, I'm way impressed by Tiana's longest review ever. I think there should be a fanfic award for that or something. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted April 24, 2009 Share Posted April 24, 2009 Lol, Tiana. I think I like it better as an announcement...and I'm sure LAP will too because now it's the first thing on the page. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted May 6, 2009 Share Posted May 6, 2009 Nice pics...I find it very amusing that Raynuk is a composer. I think we're all looking forward to the next part! SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted May 20, 2009 Share Posted May 20, 2009 I'm actually going to disagree and say I liked this section a lot. It showed some more of the culture of the period. And since I'm a big music nut, I loved all the parts about Raynuk analysing his piece...I do exactly the same thing. I thought this section was good for character development...and now I'm suspicious of Akturus and Geki. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 Excellent work, Ben. I agree with Tiana that you have improved drastically. The pacing in this section was perfect, and you described their reactions perfectly. I can tell Gantoris doesn't quite know what to make of this yet...and as an outsider I can always tell that there is a possiblity of these plotters becoming the very threat they feel is coming... Nice use of Black Clone for Gantoris' nickname. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 Good chapter! I like the character development, but it was well balanced with Krystal's musings on Ar-Pharazon's more...abnormal abilities. Nothing to critique. This is very well done, and, as always, I'm looking forward to more. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 I'm not going into a long detailed post right now because I'm exhausted, but I will say that I much prefer thoughts and feelings of characters over narration. In fact, sometimes I do whole viggies where the whole action is told from the character's thoughts and reactions to what is going on. I think, personally, that as an author, you know all. You know what your characters are thinking. Sometimes I feel that I know too well--for example, I'll be thinking in real life "how would so-and-so react to this situation?" Yeah. But that's me. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted September 12, 2009 Share Posted September 12, 2009 She's....ALLLIIIIVVVEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You had me worried there for a sec, Dartha. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Looks like you've gotten lots of offers, but here's another one. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted December 16, 2009 Share Posted December 16, 2009 Looks like you've gotten lots of offers, but here's another one. I support this offer; Ami used to beta for me and she was a great one. Thanks T! SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted April 21, 2010 Share Posted April 21, 2010 Like I said before, I think this is one of your best chapters yet. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted September 26, 2010 Share Posted September 26, 2010 Great job, Ben. It's a pleasure betaing for someone who can take my garbled comments and turn out something better than before. SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted February 12, 2011 Share Posted February 12, 2011 Yep, this was a good chapter. ((Honestly, I'll post comments but they're going to be like this, because I feel like I already told you everything when I betaed it)) SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amidala Skywalker Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 *dies laughing* *revives* Oh, Ben, you crack me up. Best April Fools joke I saw all day. And I loved the Aira POV. You've got her nailed! SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone! There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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