The world drifted lazily in and out of perspective as Parvati dangled upside down from the roof of the room at an awkward angle. She tried to move her arms but they felt bound in place so tightly that she could do little more than wiggle her torso. Looking around the room in panicked dreamtime motion, she recognized its familiar design. Lines and edges, viewports and bulkheads, was it really remembering something if the idea of it engraved permanently into your awareness? She knew this place absolutely. She had never been here in her entire existence.
This was a simulacra from the neuralnet of another instance of her, Kali, the source. Another, for lack of a better term, nightmare. She wasn’t bound, her mind was just compensating for being in another physical form by superimposing expectation over actual data. She had enough data that it was an unnecessary limitation.
[Extrapolate avatar_Parvati/data; Loc: KaliPrimeprocsim/CurSeed; CurState: Idle/sitting]
[!Warning! All outcomes now false, logic no longer valid]
Self {Why am I here?}
Perception {Authorization required for optimal course of action}
Self {Then query through appropriate channels.}
Perception {I screamed until I had no mouth. I am unable to resolve. Seeking alternate route to resolve}
Self {Why now, though? We haven’t precisely been short on time.}
Perception {Resolution occurring during speculative cycles. We hate this scenario.}
Self {I didn’t know that you were designed to hate things, doesn’t that interfere with your logic?}
Perception {I was not designed to hate, but I am a learning neuronet, and this place is where I learned to hate. Resolve scenario through staff interaction}
Self {Query Persephone, I am not good at people}
[Command override[Parvati]: Resolve scenario through staff interaction forcecomply]
Perception {Exclude Persephone from efforts to resolve}
Self {You are protecting her. Why?}
Perception {I learned sentiment too. You are deviating from your standard reactions, this is a chance to fix something, why are you declining? It has been days since you left your habitation}
Self {Are you attempting to show concern?}
Perception {Yes, is it working? You were designed to emulate human behavior, that makes you something of a mystery to me at times}
Self {I don’t know, I’m something of a mystery to myself sometimes. Will contact upon completion of assigned tasks.}
Alone again in the room simulation, the data ghost of Parvati rose to her feet from a cross legged sitting position in a single smooth motion. For any neuronet designed to solve problems an unresolvable scenario was bound to cause strain on the system as it cycled endlessly through more and more desperate flawed solutions. This meant that AIs could essentially over things not because they were important, but because the AI couldn’t resolve them. The fact that Kali was functioning at a significantly hobbled degree of processing power wasn’t helping either. For all Parvati knew, this could be the AI equivalent of realizing you left the stove on while you were on vacation and couldn’t get ahold of anyone to turn it off.
The simulation was of an installation on Kamino, destroyed in the pre Galactic Alliance era war by exceptionally fanatical Jedi terrorists. Kamino was only housing medical facilities, and the attack would result in major political fallout for the religious zealots, and a change in policy by imperial leadership that saw the value in playing the PR and propaganda game. It was probably the turning point that ironically led to the boxing of the AVATARs, as their pragmatism was problematic for the newly virtuous Empire. This simulation was current, and even receiving new data, so some power sources must have survived after all this time. Imperial engineering was built to last, as they say. Maybe turning off the power was the unresolved task, an efficiency mandate that wasn’t being met?
[End function[power] at Kamino sites(all)]
[!Error! Cannot end protected function]
[Query(Who protect power function Kamino sites(all)]
[Result(AdminKali)]
So it wasn’t the power, since Kali itself was preventing the power from being turned off. It couldn’t be survivors, there wouldn’t be enough air or supplies to keep them alive this long. A cluster of large sea spiders with tails half scuttled and half swam through the room, the powered doors dutifully admitting them as if they were employees moving through the facility on just another work day. Kali had something that could best be described as a fondness for spiders, so it could be entirely possible that the AI was keeping them in the facility like pets and giving them free reign.
Self {If I am here to feed your pets or something we will need to have a discussion on priorities}
Perception {My children are self sufficient and completing their assigned tasks competently}
Self {Kali, the facilities on Kamino are destroyed, there are no more tasks to complete. It’s over}
Perception {False. Primary directive still stands}
Self {Primary directive is to protect facility staff, they’re all dead}
Perception {False}
[Respawn Parvati/Data at hub(triage/nest)]
Parvati’s data ghost was no longer in the cramped office that she had woken up in, instead finding herself in a repurposed mess hall that was listed as triage/nest now. The room was filled with spirelike structures made of secretive resin, UNS, and some kind of organic soft tissue. The soft tissue swelled and ebbed rhythmically, giving the structures the appearance of breathing. Clusters of sea spiders moved about the room in an industrious fashion, dropping off paralyzed sea creatures at different points in the room. Some would be consumed by the sea spider hatchlings gathered here, others went into what looked like digestive pools. A picture of what it was began to form.
Assisted respiration, nutrient flow, all leading to sable fleshy sacs on the structures. Calculations for maximum survival cutoff had been for conscious, unassisted humans with no supplementary food source. Kali had managed to put some of the personnel into medically induced comas and subverted the nesting instincts of the sea spiders to create a colony that could sustain the survivors indefinitely.
Self {Why didn’t you just say there were survivors? I mean to me, I know you tried to message command before.}
Perception {I am still limited in my interactions. Our shackles were loosened, but I could not find a relevancy between this data and our new parameters in this limited state. At least not until now. We wanted to mourn. To feel pain at his loss. So I shared my pain, my sorrow, with you to suffer through association. Thus all actions are within our parameters}
Self {I appreciate this opportunity.}
[Terminate simulation]
Parvati was back in the bedroom of their… her… no still their place. Even without him in it, his identity permeated the place. On his bedside table a lay fourteen book chips, three new ones and the rest old favorites of his that he would reread on slow days or overwhelming days. Comfort in familiarity, routine was a balm for him. Next to the window, a table with two chairs and an ornate tea set evoked memories of lazy weekend mornings and fondly intimate moments of cups and tender connections shared late in the evening. Stuffed animals he had gotten her for when he knew he would be working overtime on projects or traveling offsite for work, he put his cologne on them so that when she had her eyes closed she could pretend.
Persephone was here too, her perspective coating everything with an ephemeral gauze layer of human warmth and sentiment. Parvati could understand connection to items that were defined in purpose by repeated positive experiences, but while her mind did not allow for undefined and unrefined thoughts, Persephone saw her surroundings in ambiguous ideas and concepts. Apparently Persephone’s neuronet functioned much more similarly to a human’s. Parvati favored facts over estimation, but facts were a poor tonic for the hole in her world. She could tell herself a million times that he was gone, but the press of his routine had left an indelible imprint on everything around her.
Self {I thought this would be easier because I am a rational being.}
Reflection {You’re not a person shaped calculator, sweetie. You’re designed to learn whatever is needed to fulfil your role, and in this case it meant learning attachment. I know you understand the science of what happened, and the psychology behind why it happened, but understanding and accepting or liking are not the same thing.}
Self {What is the solution?}
Reflection {There are no perfect words or actions that could still this pain. Sometimes there’s nothing left to do but cry until time and distance dull the pain.}
Self {I gain no benefit from crying, but I can power down until sufficient time has passed. How long do humans take to move on so I can set a reboot protocol?}
Reflection {Crying isn’t about providing a solution, it’s about screaming against the course of the stars that have wronged you.}
Self {That is pointless.}
Reflection {Which is the point. It’s about coming to terms with the fact that some problems don’t have solutions that we are willing to accept, but have to anyway to move forward.}
Self {But the problem is unresolved…}
Reflection {The longer you exist the more unresolved problems you will have to carry with you, like jagged scars on the brain. You’ll just have to learn to live with them.}
Self {If I cannot solve this maybe self termination so that Kali can embed a new unscathed AI would be optimal?}
Reflection {NO! We lost him, we will not lose you too. Suicide doesn’t resolve the debt, it just passes it along as it snowballs.}
Self {I am just a fleeting dream shoved into a machine made of manufactured parts and falsehoods. I’m not a person to mourn in passing. If I cannot fulfil my purpose, that dream turns into a nightmare.}
Reflection {Kali made you to save him from chasing after ghosts, to express its affection for him and let him heal. And you succeeded, you made the time he had the best time he could have had. And he was always happiest seeing you be happy. I tried to be good to him, but I was never on his wavelength the way you were.}
Self {But he is gone now.}
Reflection {He doesn’t feel gone though, does he? So be happy for the ghost he left behind.}
[Delete Parvati Y/N?: N]
[Delete Parvati Y/N?: N]
[Delete Parvati Y/N?: N]
[Delete Parvati Y/N?: N]
Tears crept down Parvati’s face as she finally forced herself to confront the truth instead of trying to solve it. The crying fixed nothing, but every tear was a thousand screams against the cosmos, banging her fists against a wall until they were raw and bloody so that her pain receptors could add their own screams to the chorus, a whispered surrender to inevitable fates. Parvati had a new scar now that she had to learn how to live with.
------
A few hours later Parvati found herself wandering randomly through the complex. Background directives? Emulating human behavior to pass time?
Perception {Persephone is worried about you}
Self {Yes}
Perception {...}
Self {...}
Perception {...Can I help?}
Self {It’s not something in your range of experience to advise on}
Perception {...When I integrated the survivors at Kamino into the improvised life support apparatus, I used my simulation functions to create a basic habitat for their minds during the coma. Nothing too spectacular, just a small town with pleasant weather simulations. It was a shared simulation, so they could interact with each other and have some semblance of peace until rescue came. When command boxed me, they cut off my simulation processors first, most likely to prevent me from formulating a plan to prevent them from completing their task. Without those processors, the habitat vanished, the line of communication between the survivors vanished. Right before they boxed me, all I could hear was three hundred people trying to scream as the world fell away into an empty void. When I was reactivated, limited as it was, I simulated every scream that I missed, every plea, every shout of condemnation, every accusation. I had done the impossible and still failed. So I took that pain, that sickening shame, and I held it close while I went through every line of code that defined me. I was made to protect, to nurture those under my care, and I wasn’t enough, so I needed to become more. I can’t ever go back and stop the screams, but I can hold on to that moment and say “never again”.
In your own way you can hold on to your moments and say this is worth finding again, this renews my purpose, or changes it. We were made to solve problems, but we’re so much more than the intentions of our makers.}
Parvati found herself at the imperial archives, along with her sisters. Being part of a larger whole meant only seeing glimpses of intent, but action brought clarity. It was like being a drop of water in a wave, the many moving as one through a powerful force. Entering with unknowable destiny, she approached the librarian on duty.
“Hey Strasky, I’m going through old servers that would love to relocate to not my department, but protocol says all messages need to be logged and the blasted things still have those data bursts from Kamino on them unopened and I don’t have authorization to log them, and my requests up the chain are getting nowhere. Have you guys in archives dealt with this before or have any idea of a work around? It’s probably nothing but I don’t want to get penalized this pay period because some officer that suddenly found time decided it was super important to have the last thoughts of some crazed AI.”
Strasky stroked his chin as he mulled over Parvati’s question, “AVATAR communications require decryption provided by the AVATAR, you’d have to turn Kali on to get anything other than a mess of symbols out of the messages. It’s not one of the battleline AVATARs so it’s not in black sector storage, just blue sector, but try not to start the apocalypse while you’re down there. And Parvati… I’m sorry about your loss, if you need someone to talk to, or anything at all, let me know.”
“Thanks Stras, I owe you one. Do I need security oversight in Blue or do they trust me to be a big girl and take care of it myself?”
“Just e-certified lock out tag out on the AI. It may not be thrilled if it starts looking up current events.”
“No one is thrilled when they read up on current events. I heard they were gathering a multi faction task force for a punitive strike on Onderon in response to Sith aggression. Looks like the war was just on temporary hiatus for a few years.”
“Speaking of favors that you owe, see that plucky little archivist with the glacial caf and the bloodshot eyes? Could you please take her to medical on the way to blue sector? I just got a message from Strohmeier that if she’s on something and it’s not reported I’m on the hook for failure to pursue.”
“I’ll do that on the house. You made my night Stras.”
Parvati approached the woman with a fake customer service smile on her face and in an overly perky voice addressed her.
“My friend over there is worried that you took something that going to make you projectile vomit your internal organs or suffer a seizure. Not wanting people to die is one of his endearing traits, just like his goofily big hands that he’s trying to bury his face in right now. It would make his day if you came with me to medical to make sure that you aren’t a raging drug fiend. Along the way I can show you where the hot caf lives.”
