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ATTENTION CITIZENS OF THE GALAXY

LIGHTSABER USE LINKED TO CANCER.

 

This is a special service announcement from a group of concerned citizens. Self defense is essential and blasters have always been a traditional means of defense until recently, noting the rise in lightsaber use. A study recently conducted by a group of noted scientists have reached the following conclusion following an intensive and thorough battery of tests and research, proving what Coruscant Dr. N. Riviera deemed "conclusive evidence linking lightsaber use with tumor growth."

 

The end results of extended lightsaber use, based on case studies shows patients ending up looking like this:

 

palpatine.gifyoda.gif

 

The primary sponsor of this study, Kheldar vos Correlli, CEO of KVC Enterprises and its subsidiaries, along with study co-sponsor Blastech industries and the IGBIA (Inter-Galactic Blaster Industry Association) released this following statement:

 

I am deeply troubled by this disturbing news linking lightsaber use to cancer. I can say that I've never found the need for a lightsaber, always relying on my trusty blasters to get me out of trouble, even trumping the occasional force user in battle. I can say I'm glad I do not have to worry about widowing my wife or leaving my daughters without a father by having my own weapon kill me.

 

The study showed a 20% link between lightsaber use and tumors in the lower appendix. Study was conducted based on findings for a 2 week period based on a random sample of citizens near the waste disposal sector of lower Coruscant.

KVCsig.jpg

 

The monarch of madness has returned!

 

[Associate of the Illinois Mafia since March 2002.]

[2nd in Command of the Lords of Hate since March 2002.]

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Your First Drink At The Mos Eisley Cantina Is On Us!

 

Come to the Mos Eisley Cantina (conveniently located within the Mos Eisley Spaceport) now, and your first drink will be covered by Tatooine's 'wonderful human beings' - the Hutts.

 

Offer open exclusively to employees and business associates of the Hutts.

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THIS MESSAGE IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE SUPPORTERS OF BLACK SUN

 

NEED A JOB? WANT TO LEARN HOW TO RIP OUT SOMEONE'S AORTA AND STRANGLE THEM WITH IT, THEN RIP OFF THEIR ARM AND BEAT THEIR ASSOCIATES TO DEATH WITH IT?? EVER HAD THE URGE TO KILL SOME JEDI SCUM? WELL THEN, HAVE WE GOT THE JOB FOR YOU!!TRAVEL TO EXOTICE PLACES, MEET LOVELY WOMEN, USE STATE OF THE ART WEAPONS TO DEMOLISH THE POOR ALGAE-LICKERS OF THE UNIVERSE WITH BLACK SUN!!

 

THE FOLLOWING POSITIONS ARE AVALIABLE:

 

-Mercenary

-Bounty Hunter

-Pilot

-Weapons tech specialist

-clerk

-Secretary

-Quarter Master

-Armorer

-Mechanic

-custodian

-Training Specialist

-Agent

-And Many More!!

 

Just stop by your local Black Sun Citadel and ask for Jaster or Picollo. See you soon.

 

blacksun.gif

 

Possiblity of death and torture assured. Some expeirance required.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Kheldar vos Correlli buys the Force

 

From the Galactic Associated Press:

 

Coruscant- In a ground breaking venture, business mogul Kheldar vos Correlli, the galaxies wealthiest citizen, CEO of KVC Enterprises and the Corellian Engineering Corporation among his other holdings struck a deal, giving him ownership of the Force.

 

The omnipotent consciousness, made from the life of all creation and the all powerful force which gives the extraordinary strength to the Sith and Jedi signed over a deal, giving its rights exclusively to KVC Enterprises CEO vos Correlli.

 

When asked to elaborate why the deal was taken, the Force, speaking through a balance force monk adept issued the following.

 

"While omnipotence and having absolute power of the fabric of reality has its benefits, we must accept the fact that it can only reach so far when compared to the ever growing power of economics. We'd like to consider this more of a merger than a pure buy out."

 

At a press conference, Kheldar spoke of his own plans for his new purchase. "I can promise to improve upon light and dark side synergy, as well as making force use profitable. A new proposal calls for liscencing force and midi chlorien use to people like Jedi and Sith, drawing in fees and other costs. In addition we are considering using force powered batteries to cut down on unreliable fusion engines."

 

When asked for a demonstration to show this was not an elaborate hoax from a heckling reporter, vos Correlli reportedly snaped his hands and flung the offencious reporter into a wall, then sued his paper for damages to his building's infastructure. That case is still pending.

 

The reaction to this met with mixed results:

 

A spokesman for the Jedi issued the following statement. "Listen man! I don't care what you say, the Force belongs to everyone! Stupid capitalists are trying to keep the common force user down with their bourgoise plans."

 

The Sith statement came out as follows. "Fool! He underestimates the power of the force! Money! Ha! Unadultered blood is the only currency which can buy the force!

 

A statement was expected from the mysterious Dark Jedi Order, but after our correspondent was found soul stripped and left a rotting zombie we since gave up trying to coax one from them.

 

Generally speaking this has received a postive response from the bounty hunting and smuggling community, seeking to buy new force exclusive zones and planets to conduct business free of force related interference.

 

When asked what his next set of long range plans with his purcahse was, a spokesman for Kheldar alluded to the possibility of trying to quell Vong hostilities by liscencing Force infusions. Response from the Vong War chiefs on this has been met with skepticism and wariness, though results appear favorable.

 

More on this story as it develops.

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him." -Mark Twain

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  • 4 weeks later...

VIET-WOK REBELS ISSUE MANIFESTO

 

From the Galactic Associated Press- Endor:

 

In breaking news an Ewok, calling himself, "El Angelo del Muerto," later identified as rejected Sith Apprentice "Wicked" Willet Wolly.

 

ewok.jpg

 

Issuing the following coat of arms, Willet declared a new movement and faction in galactic politics:

 

soviet%20coat.jpg

 

Calling himself the ordained leader of the Viet-Wok, the self proclaimed communist overlord of Endor issued a statement declaring for the abolition of private property and a centralized state centered on socialist ideals, challenging Imperial and former new Republic precepts of government. He has threatened to impliment full out guerilla warfare on the forest moon of Endor, eventually spreading it across the galaxy in a red tide of "Marxist ideals and blood." When asked who and what Marx was, Willet shrugged his shoulders then clubed and scalped our first correspondant.

 

After doing so, Willet issued the following statement:

 

"Yub Yub! Chathuhuta mala ruga! Yub Yub! Huta Malag Ragoa! Huta!!!!"

 

[Translation: We will destroy all these capitalists infidels and their false gods. Until our demands are met prepare to face us off on the forest move and where ever else you money grubbing lightside chaging dogs dare show your faces. We, the Viet-Wok will hunt you down, club you and eat your souls! WORKERS OF THE WORLD UNITE! THE EWOK REVOLUTION IS AT HAND!]

 

At this point Willet tried mauling our camera man to death and we promptly beat it out of there.

EWOKS RULE ALL!!! rotj-wicket.gif

 

za25wPx.jpg

Totus vestri substructio es adiungere nobis

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startoursrebelalliance.jpgTHE REBELLION REBORN! startoursrebelalliance.jpg

 

Today, General Forn Dodonna of the Alliance to Restore the Republic, issued a statement to the Galaxy at large.

 

"We, of the Rebel Alliance, wish to make it known that we are still here," she said to an assemblage of beings representing many factions, species, and races of the galaxy. "We fully intend to keep up the fight to restore freedom and justice to the Galaxy. Our hearts are true, and our heads are clear."

 

General Dodonna went on to state that, though the Rebellion is making a comeback, "We still need all the help we can get. It is the duty of all who are able, in this day and age, to help and give aid to those who cannot help themselves. We need all who are able to help us in this fight."

 

Reactions to the annoucement of the Alliance to Restore the Republic's intentions to continue were, predictably, polarized.

 

"We are extremely glad to hear that the Rebellion has not given in to the pressures that the Empire is putting on all the Galaxy," said a representative of the Jedi Order. "It is also good to know that they are reaching out to accept help from others not formally affiliated. We Jedi have come to rely on them, and they, us."

 

Reactions from the Empire were typical. "We simply cannot believe that anyone would be willing to live without the gracious rule of His Excellency, the Resurrected Emperor Palpatine. Frankly, I am disgusted that these simpletons think that they're somehow better than us, and I might point out that they rely heavily on fabricated propaganda!"

 

Of course, this statement is squarely at odds with recent Imperial activities, which include the vicious attack on Hoth, and the destruction of the peaceful world of Dantooine, among many other atrocities.

 

The Sith Order had this to say: "Those pathetic fools think they can stand against us! Like the pathetic Jedi who foolishly stand by their side, they shall fall!"

 

The Black Sun organization and the Hutt clan were indifferent. "As long as they don't interfere with my business, I'll let them be," Wyhl the Hutt was reported to have said.

 

In closing, General Dodonna reiterated that, in the end; "Even in the face of so much going on, we shall persevere, and in the end, with the help and faith of the Galaxy at large, we will prevail."

FornAvatarsig2.jpg

 

"The Emperor has made a critical error, and the time for our

attack has come..." Mon Mothma, Return of the Jedi

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OOC((Remember what happened last time you posted my actions? Here's the actual imperial response, given by Emperor Palpatine...))

 

"It has come to my attention that rebel terrorists recently adressed the galaxy, claiming to be champions of freedom and justice. But what freedom and justice do they bring? Be wary of the words of these firebrands, for while they may be charismatic and appealing, they hide the true nature of these malcontents. The rebels are composed of smugglers, murderers, thieves, and charlatans, hiding behind a supposedly noble goal so that they may gain public support. They rage against our system because they desire power and personal gain, for who else but them would you turn to as leaders should they succeed. Who would have the same people that unleashed a mutagenic virus in Coruscant's water supply governing their safety? Who could support a body politic that launches proton torpedos into residential blocks?

 

Let us remember the failings of the old republic, a system that could not function effectively, due to its inability to respond to situations and the corruption of the beaurecrats. It was only with the creation of the empire that people could live in the safety and protection of a system that could respond immediately and effectively to threats. Even after the hard lessons of the old republic, another republic was formed to govern the galaxy. And once again, that republic failed, doing virtually nothing to stop the Arach'tar incursion into this galaxy. Or rather, failed the people under its so called protection. Meanwhile, the senators themselves filled their coffers with bribes and other illegal sources.

 

In closing, these terrorists would have you throw away the safety and security of the empire to further their own interests. Please report any rebel activity to your local imperial law enforcement so that they may handle the situation before the rebels become a threat to you and your loved ones."

Hand of Shodan: Now, we want no Sith fleet interference in our plot, could you post one of your messages?

Hand of Shodan: jk

*******: I could.....but can you pm me what thread and what is the plot line and who is allowed to be involved....

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Mercenaries Destroy The Black Sun's Fleet

 

Galactic Associated Press:

 

In the relative darkness of space above the capital planet Coruscant, everything seemed to be fine - everything seemed normal. Freighters, shuttles, fighters, and ships of war made their way across the starscape, each going about their own business. But, in the blink of an eye, all of that changed. With a flash of psuedomotion, a vast armada of mercenary ships tore out of hyperspace - the space above Coruscant would never be normal again. First a single shot of ion energy lanced forth from the biggest ship in the mercenary armada - a Mon Calamari Star Cruiser. After a brief moment, a thousand ion cannons flashed as the rest of the armada fired their ion cannons as well. The targets - the battered Black Sun fleet that hung in space like a wounded animal. After several long moments, the battle really began - the mercenary armada begin to fire using their turbolaser cannons.

 

As blasts of energy shoot this way and that, each hitting one of the Black Sun's battered ships, the two Nebulon-B Frigates in the mercenary armada, rocketed forward and finished off the battered enemy ships - after a moment, nothing was left. As the two Nebulon-B Frigates move back into position, the Mon Calamari Star Cruiser and the two Imperial Star Destroyers in the mercenary armada launch their starfighters and support craft - V-19 Torrent starfighters, Skipray Blastboats, and X-Wing starfighters. Flanked by two Corellian Corvettes, the starfighter prepare for battle.

 

Just then, right on time, the rest of the Black Sun's pathetic fleet emerged from hyperspace. Some of the Black Sun's smaller craft rushed to the surface of Coruscant, seemingly determined to protect the little Black Sun citadel. V-19 Torrent starfighters and Skipray Blastboats from the mercenary armada follow. Ghost Leader, head of the first wave of the V-19 Torrent starfighters and Skipray Blastboats, laughed as she saw the way the Black Sun's pilots were fighting, according to her account, the Black Sun's fighter pilots were poorly trained - they were using concussion missiles against V-19 Torrents and Skiprays, relatively small and agile ships. In a show of bravado, Ghost Leader led her unit of mercenary ships to victory - Ghost Leader engaged the Black Sun's ships and, because of her and her unit's superior flying and fighting skills, triumphed.

 

Back up in space, a number of Firesprays begin to leak away from the Mon Calamari Star Cruiser and the other ships. The Firesprays, aided by the X-Wings that had launched at the start of the battle, quickly engaged the Black Sun's TIE Defenders. Havoc Leader, head of the main group of Firesprays, activates his ship's rocket launcher, and sends two guided rockets flying at the enemy fighters. Beaming after the rockets hit and exploded, Havoc Leader ordered his fellow pilots to use similar tactics. The Firesprays and X-Wings make short work out of the ten TIE Defenders - after several moments, none remained.

 

With that, the Mon Calamari Star Cruiser and the two Imperial Star Destroyers began to fire volleys of ion energy at the Black Sun's Mon Calamari Star Cruiser and Dungeon Ship. As the Black Sun's ships were momentarily disabled by the ion energy, the remaining Firesprays and X-Wings moved in and made their attack runs. The mercenary ships aimed at the outer weapon systems of the Black Sun's ships, as well as the bridges, and used guided rockets and proton torpedoes. As they did, the two Nebulon-B Frigates and the four Corellian Corvettes moved in and directly engaged the Black Sun's Star Destroyers and Nebulon-B Frigate.

 

At this point, the Black Sun's fleet began to pull away. As they did, the two Nebulon-B Frigates and the four Corellian Corvettes begin to fire upon the fleeing ships using heavy ion cannons. While the Corellian Corvettes targeted random ships, the two Nebulon-B Frigates specifically fired upon the Black Sun's Dungeon Ship - powerful blasts from the heavy ion cannon momentarily disabled the ship. With that, the Mon Calamari Star Cruiser and the two Imperial Star Destroyers also began to fire. Turbolaser cannons blasting, the Star Cruiser and Star Destroyers tore holes through the Dungeon Ship - one shot hit the ship's engines, and a moment later, the Dungeon Ship was no more.

 

Next, the Nebulon-B Frigates, the Corellian Corvettes, the Imperial Star Destroyers, and the Mon Calamari Star Cruiser concentrated on the Black Sun's Mon Calamari Star Cruiser and Nebulon-B Frigate. Once again, the Nebulon-B Frigates and the Corellian Corvettes fired their heavy ion cannons, while one of the Star Destroyers fired at the fleeing Mon Calamari Star Cruiser using a few turbolaser cannons. The other Star Destroyers and the Mon Calamari Star Cruiser fired their turbolaser cannons at the Black Sun's Nebulon-B Frigate.

 

At this point, what was left of the Black Sun's fleet blasted into hyperspace in a final, cowardly act.

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The Black Sun Organization made this official announcement Thursday,

 

"The Black Sun Armada has in no way been compromised. We assure everyone it will be fully operational, and ready for combat very soon. Reports of its destruction are partial truths and exaggerations spread by one Ob Ordeena and his cronies. The illegal attack referred to in Holonet reports was stopped by the law enforcing Imperials.

 

The attack was implemented with no regard to civilian casualties, and was in response to the Black Sun's strike against Ordeena's forces on Bespin. Ordeena had attempted to assassinate several high ranking Black Sun affiliates. The Black Sun discovered his plot and dealt with it. Unfortunately for all law abiding citizens he has returned.

 

To prevent further mindless destruction, and harm to the citizens of Coruscant, the Black Sun has officially placed a bounty on the Ordeena, for the negotiable sum of thirty million credits. We simply wish to do our legitimate business without interference from the criminals that threaten the way of life for all those living in the Core.

 

Thank you"

 

-Black Sun Armada Captain

pJzctEZ.png

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Piccolo Attacks Young Bith Musician

 

Galactic Associated Press:

 

Piccolo, the current head of the Black Sun, was arrested today by the Imperials on charges that he, and an acquaintance, attempted to sexually molest a young Bith musician on a landing pad outside of Coruscant's Last Call Cantina. The Imperials arrested Piccolo, and his acquaintance, Luthis Vandren, after the pair left the young Bith musician lying in a pool of blood. An Imperial spokesperson has said that Piccolo may have falsely identified himself as a Imperial agent before ripping off the young Bith musician's clothes (on a side note, the young Bith musician's pipe is still missing). Piccolo and his acquaintance, Luthis Vandren, are being charged with sexual harassment, criminal impersonation, and criminal mischief. It is not clear how the arrest may effect his leadership of the Black Sun - a criminal organization bent on taking over the Core.

 

Representatives for Piccolo were not available for comment as of press time.

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Battle Over Coruscant Stopped

 

Today, a mercenary fleet attacked the Black Sun Armada and drove the armada away. The mercenary fleet was preparing to storm the Black Sun Citadel, however, your all-seeing Emperor decided that an attack on the Citadel would kill too many civilians. I, Captain Haster Kirgo, intervened with a show of force of the Grand Imperial Navy. The honorable mercenaries knew they could not attack Black Sun (or vice versa) without suffering the terrible wrath of the Navy. The mercenaries backed down as did Black Sun. The Navy applauds both parties actions and I wish to remind the galaxy that the Empire has peace in mind. Any actions that endanger our beloved citizens will be countered with unimaginable ruthlessness. Long live his majesty, Emperor Palpatine.

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Honest Krathe's Bounty Service

 

Do you need someone disintigrated? Tracked down, and brought to swift Justice? Do you need someone kidnapped? Honest Krathe's Bounty Service is your answer! Services include:

 

-Killing

-Maiming

-Kidnapping

-Carbonite "treatment"

-Disintigration

-Corpse Disposal

-Acquisition of Rare materials and Artifacts

 

Just one call, we do it all! We are your one-stop Galactic shop for all your Bounty needs!

 

*Balos Krathe is not responsible for damages to any or all goods captured, borrowed, acquired, or otherwise obtained. This ad is not sponsored or endorsed by CORSEC, the Bounty Hunter's Guild, the Hutt Clans, the Empire, the Rebellion, the Sith, the Jedi, or the Smuggler's Guild. All rates and restrictions apply. Call for more details.

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I am placing a large bounty on Jaina Jade Skywalker. I want her brought to me alive. I am offering 100,000 credits for her delivery. I want her alone and alive again. To receive instructions once you have her contact me on this frequency. You will then recieve further instructions to recieve payment. Thank you for your time.

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VIET-WOK REBELS RELEASE NEW VIDEO

 

From the Galactic Associated Press- Endor:

 

ewok.jpg

 

El Presidente of the UEER- United Endorian Ewok Socialist Republics, Willet Wolly issued a new propoganda piece for mass consumption following the cleansing of Mother Endor by those "Garnock val hoot! "

 

[Translation: Filthy Sith Capitalist **** **** ****!]

 

to commemorate this victory, the following video was sent out to various governments and Imperial represenatives, leaving many of them speechless.

 

EWOK RALLYING VIDEO

EWOKS RULE ALL!!! rotj-wicket.gif

 

za25wPx.jpg

Totus vestri substructio es adiungere nobis

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The Light has Sprung

 

As we have covered on the previous story about the sexual harassment, new information has been found. The whole thing was a set-up, the woman was paid credits to hang on Piccolo and the infamous Luthis Vandross(typo). The charges were knocked off, and Ob's mother was let loose after she testified that her son had forced her, and it was in no way, shape or form the Black Sun's wrong doing. More on this story at 10 O'Clock.

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Convicted Sex Offender Spreads Lies Over The 'Net

 

Galactic Associated Press:

 

Luthis Vandren, one of the sick individuals charged with sexually harassing a young Bith musician on a deserted Coruscant landing pad, has been lacing the ”˜net with malicious lies, in a vain attempt to defame Ob Ordeena, Baron Administrator of Cloud City. At the present time, a bounty has been placed on Vandren, a known sex offender. More to come.

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TERRORISTS STRIKE AT GALACTIC TRADE CORPORATION'S HEADQUARTERS, UNEMPLOYMENT SPIKE EXPECTED DUE TO DOWNSIZING!

 

In yet another dastardly display of Rebel desperation, the volatile Alliance launched a devastating attack on the galaxy's frail economic stability. The Rebel Terrorists crashed into the Corporate Headquarters and the resulting inferno caused a tremendous number of casualties, caused a plunge in the Daisaku Trade Company stock and created a possible wave of unemployment.

 

Reactions were as to be expected:

 

Daisaku Trade Company worker:

"All in the name of freedom... Bah, say that to my wife and children!"

 

Imperial Press Secretary:

"... and they (Rebels) claim we are destroying the Galaxy..."

 

Jedi:

"Our loyal friends, the Rebels would never act so harshly, after all, they believe in the people. It is impossible."

 

Sith:

"The weak perish... So be it."

 

Hutts:

"We find it difficult to fathom that such an act could be taken on the volatile Economy, it shows, the Rebels have no sense of Economics. At least the Empire knows money, and people."

 

No comment or replies were returned from the Rebels.

 

And, as always, remember People of the Empire, the Empire works to keep us working.

 

If you're against Unemployment... Say no to the Rebels!

phillep.jpg

 

--Holo to the Rebel Alliance--

*Raiden's ass appeared on the monitors again, only this time with a smiley face drawn on it.*

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KVC Enterprises makes killing in Galactic Markets

 

Galactic Associated Press- Corellia, Coronet City

 

Lord Ganelon of Seneferia, acting as spokesman for the enigmatic Kheldar vos Correlli, monarch of Kheldaria, owner of over a a dozen star systems, and sole holder of various companies such as the Corellian Engineering Corporation, the Galactic Trading Guild, The Force Ltd., and chair of the Inter-Galactic Blaster Industry Association, gave a rousing statement on Corellia, marking a new round of expansions on Coruscant and Corellia with plans to expand its ever growing trade empire.

 

Lord Ganelon of house Bosel, dressed in a velvety orange overcoat custom of the noblilty of Seneferia was seen at the conference, a plump cigar stuck in his blue skinned face.

 

"We are saddened to hear of the news of the attack on the Daisaku Trade Corporation. Mr. Correlli was a close associate of Mr. and Mrs. Daisaku and we are glad they escaped the rebel sack of the citadel unharmed. iCEO Piccolo's death was tragic, but KVC Enterprises is doing the best they can to rebuild the economy. It was amazing foresight we managed to short sell our holdings in the Xizor Transport Systems/DTC company prior to the attack. We'll be keeping those poor workers employed by buying up the damaged assets of the company. We're offering the expansion of 3,000,000 new jobs on Coruscant, as well as other jobs at key planets held by the XTS/DTC company. Our analysts predict while there will be a hiccup in the economy, it wil be stronger than ever before."

 

He took a puff of his cigar, obtained from Tatooine apparently, and continued.

 

"We are working the new owners of Bespin and Nal Hutta Holdings Consilidated to ensure this is a safe, smooth, and productive transition. Though those accursed rebels have struck a blow, His Majesty's Imperial government will crush them, not even showing the least sign of weakness as the economy will rebound like Timerian rubber."

 

When reporters asked about the rumors of the strike on the XTS/DTC as being internal politics between the criminal orginzation of Black Sun and the rogue Hutts involving a mercinary fleet, Ganelon laughed.

 

"That is absurd. Mr. Correlli's commercial empire is the best source of information in the galaxy. If something like that happened, we would know. Besides, the honorable Captain Phillep of his Majesty's Navy has already issued a report placing it in rebel hands. Thank you ladies and gentlemen and let the public know that KVC Enterprises is turning this grevious misfortune into an opportunity- not only for themselves, but for all citizens of the galaxy. May the force be with you and may commerce flow!"

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him." -Mark Twain

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--*Highly encrypted transmission; piggybacked and untracable*--

 

"One thinks that if the Empire knows so much about employment and the economy, they would not have their entire Galactic trade operations centrally located. But then, that's standard Imperial SOP -- rigidity and centrallity."

 

Speaking from an undisclosed location, the Rebel General angrily denounced the blame assigned to the Rebel Alliance by the Empire, for the destruction of the Galactic Trade Center.

 

"We're military, not terrorists, and I can assure the Galaxy that we had nothing to do with this." Forn Dodonna said, keeping her voice level. "Also, an attack of this nature, in case anyone would care to notice, is highly unlikely given our own preferred style of engagement."

 

"Now, citizens of the Galactic Empire, and of the rest of the Galaxy, does it really make sense for the Empire to blame us for something we had nothing to do with? Do you really trust the Empire, if they're willing to lie about events such as this?"

 

There is a pause as Forn recieves a durasheet document.

 

"Well, citizens, it seems I've got a bit of new intel here...it was the Black Sun Citadel that was destroyed, and in fact it was committed by a faction within the Hutt Clan -- both allies of the Empire. Well then, ladies and gentlemen, if the Empire cannot keep control over their allies and their own homeworld, or even give you citizens the truth, just how strong and safe can they really be? What will you do in future?"

 

((OOC: Wow, this looks familiar, Phillep...and we're not Iraq. ))

FornAvatarsig2.jpg

 

"The Emperor has made a critical error, and the time for our

attack has come..." Mon Mothma, Return of the Jedi

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Rebel Leader Spreads Lies Over The 'Net

 

Galactic Associated Press:

 

Friends, foes, and fruits, it is I, Ob Ordeena, Baron Administrator of Cloud City. I have come before you to clear up some nasty rumors that have been floating about over the ”˜net. It appears that the rebels wish to create chaos, by spreading malicious lies about the Hutts. I wish to set the record straight. The Hutts, and I, of course, had no part in the recent attack on Coruscant. According to my agents, it was the rebels who attacked Coruscant. The rebels, guided by their terrorist leader, this Forn Dodonna, wish to destroy the peace that the Empire has crafted ”“ I urge everyone, every man, woman, child, and alien to take up arms against the rebels. Good night, and remember, the Hutts are innocent.

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ShadowFett taps into the holonet and posts this message in response to the arguement.

 

"I will set this strait. Black Sun was attacked and all but defeated by a group of Mercenaries by the names of Rane Scando, Mike Attard, Patch Deftide and Tekkan Raas. They were accompanied by their own forces and a group claiming to be with the Hutts, but I do belive I recall seeing the insignia of the Rebel Alliance upon their shoulder pauldrons. Now, Black Sun has a firm alliance with both the Hutts and the Empire, and I wish to make it clear that Whyl the Hutt was not behind the attack."

 

"Rather, rumors are being passed about of a group of Rogue Hutts allied with the Rebel Alliance with some desire to see Black Sun fall. I believe that in light of Black Sun's attack on Cloud City, the slime known as Ob Ordeena worked with these Rogues and hired the mercenaries to attack Black Sun."

 

Satisfied, he logged out and cut transmission.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Do you want to fight for good in the galaxy? Do you want to become an expert in the fields of spying, weaponry, and wilderness survival? Do you think you have what it takes to be part of an elite organization?

 

If so, then the Death Strikers are for you!!

 

Come enjoy our state-of-the-art facilities and training techniques! With the Death Strikers, you can become a ground fighter, air fighter, spy/slicer, or one of many other exciting fields!

 

The Death Strikers are elite fighters that are known for their ability to use anything as a weapon. They are deadly enemies to those who seek to cause strife in the galaxy or harm the innocent.

 

Now accepting new members!!

 

Come be part of the newest, most exciting faction in the galaxy!

 

For more information contact Induran Habithae on Altyr 5.

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SHE MEANS TO END US ALL!!! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!11eleventyone!
There goes Ami's reputation of being a peaceful, nice person.
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Emperor Issues GI Mandate!

 

-Imperial Daily Press

 

A new Imperial Mandate was issued by your Imperial Majesty, Emperor Palpatine, providing greater Health Care and Educational possibilities for current Commissioned Imperial Officers and their families.

 

Benefits include waivers for successive generations gaining entrance to the esteemed Imperial Academy, tax reliefs towards new air and land speeders, tax breaks on new Real Estate purchases and increased salaries.

 

Come join the Imperial War Machine today to receive the plentiful benefits of the new Imperial Mandate!

 

Sign up today at your local Recruiter's Office or be left behind...

 

Available Positions:

Elite Infantry Commandos

Strategic Reconnaisance Agents

TIE Defender Pilots and Squadron Leaders

Capital Ship Officers

Public Relations Positions

*Previous Experiences a Plus!

 

Over 212 ways to be an Imperial Citizen... No matter your skill!

 

YOUR FUTURE AWAITS!

 

Contact your Local Recruiter or Comm us at 1.800.IN.POWER!

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--Holo to the Rebel Alliance--

*Raiden's ass appeared on the monitors again, only this time with a smiley face drawn on it.*

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Today in the news:

 

JAWA ATTACK!!!!!

Reports coming in from the planet of Tatooine indicate disaster has struck the small city of Mos Espa. Eye witness reports indicate that a small band of Jawas have made an attack on the city, their current situation is unknown at the time.

 

Mos Espa, home to Podracing, smugglers, and the old Darth Vader has invited locals and tourists alike for generations. Current reports now indicate that the city has been destroyed. One of our own reporters was in Mos Espa at the time. Before being taken prisoner by jawa forcers, the report caught this:

 

With gun in one hand, droid head in the other, the leader of what is becoming known as Al-Jawa made a speech to the prisoners.... and perhapes the rest of the galaxy near the end of the engagement:

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[Outsiders of the galaxy, harken my words. Your time of reign is coming to an end. For too long my people have suffered under the iron fist of humans and aliens alike. For far too long my people have been denied their destiny. But now, as the great suns of Tatooine shine down on me, I vow this: The Nation of Jawa will fight back. As I stand on the battle grounds of Mos Espa, I say this: All Outsiders are now considered infidels and will be dealt with accordingly. This is your only warning.] End Translation

 

The young leader ended with this: "Ooteenie Al-Jawa!", Long live the Nation of Jawa.

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