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A Collection of Poems (Complete)


Raynuk Montar
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So in the middle of my nutso writing last night to update Torment, I recalled at one point that I had written (or at least I thought I did) something way back when revolving around the idea of "What if Darth Maul had lived?" So this morning I went digging for it, and instead found my collection of poems from High school. And I'm in a sharing mood, so here they are. There are a lot.

 

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Darkness

 

The darkness comes

and the darkness goes

With each new day

 

Something changes

I know not what

or why it is so

But something changes

 

I know not if it is good or bad

if I should smile

or cower in fear

 

The darkness grows

In my heart

and in my head

I fear what it will do

when it finishes its work

 

Will my life be better?

Or will it cause me pain

in time I will find out

 

But in the midst of darkness

there is still hope

within the darkness

there is life

Within the darkness...

 

Love still shines.

 

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Why O Why

 

Every time I see you,

I start to wonder”¦

Why o why,

I'm so darn shy?

I see u everyday,

And then I realize,

Why o why,

You are so pretty.

We have another year,

And maybe more,

Why o Why,

Is it so?

Why o Why,

Am I tortured so,

Why o why,

Can't I show how I feel?

To all the world,

So that they will know,

How I feel,

How I ache,

How I say to myself,

Why o why,

Can't it be so?

 

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As I walk though the halls again

 

As I walk though the Halls again,

I think back, and remember when,

As I walk though the halls again,

I say "hi" to my happy friends,

As I walk though the halls again,

I wonder when, my next class will end,

As I walk though the halls again,

I see your face, and can't help but smile,

As I walk through the halls again,

I wonder why this day must end,

And think of tomorrow,

So I can walk though the halls again,

And see your smiling face,

 

Once...again...

 

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If you only knew

If you only knew,

How I feel every time I see you smile,

If you only knew,

How I long for your love,

If you only knew,

The way I'd cherish you,

I wrote these poems,

If you only knew,

How i've always wished,

I could give you these poems,

And show to you,

I am sincere when I say,

I cant live,

With out seeing you.

 

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Day by Day

 

I sit here day after day,

Wondering what I did wrong

I was cursed with shyness beyond my control

And now I feel helpless as to what to do

I never wanted this to be true

But in the back of my head I couldn't deny it

I can barely talk to girls every day

And I hate myself for my lack of abilities

I curse myself every time it happens

Every time I let a opportunity pass me by

 

It's getting easier,

But it will never be easy enough

I have problems it seems no one understands

And here I am helping my friends through their own lives

And I can't even fix the problems in my life

Why can't I have what I want?

Why is my life so hard at times?

 

I sit here writing this with tears in my eyes

I need guidance and help

I get too involved in things I shouldn't

As the more important things get left in the dust

They don't deserve that spot

Back in the dust where I left them

I try so hard to change my ways

But it never seems to be enough

 

People tell me I'm sweet

That I'm a really nice guy

But for some reason I don't see it

I don't understand it

Someone help me reach my goal

I've used all my power to help you

And left none for myself

And so I turn to my friends

I ask for help in this poem

Help me fix the wrongs inside me

 

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Ok thats enough for now... I didnt realize how angsty and kinda sad/pathetic some of these sound to me now, Oh to be in High School and full of such hormones and such I will post more later, give you crazy people a chance to read these ones.

1fE1uLv.png

I ate a hippo. It was delicious.

May the Forth therve you well...

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Yeah, as sad as it is, thats how a good number of them are, though they werent always about myself. Case in point, here is one I wrote about two of my friend's relationship, who I actually played matchmaker for....

 

Torn Relationship

 

It started off with a simple glance,

A shy smile in return,

They both walked on,

Without a second glance,

But their minds were racing,

About the other they had seen.

 

They were introduced to each other soon there after,

And became causal friends,

Over the weeks they both learned,

About each other,

And more about themselves.

 

I knew them both, way back when,

I saw them grow and make certain decisions,

And stood beside them all the way,

I was their friend,

And they were mine.

I trusted them

And they trusted me

 

Friendship soon turned into more,

And I stood beside them still

”œI'm scared,”

1fE1uLv.png

I ate a hippo. It was delicious.

May the Forth therve you well...

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Dude, I LOVE those last topic ones. Those are so hilarious and yet have a deeper meaning beyond the surface (like any good poem should do).

 

The suicide one is really sad...

 

I do wonder about the first one though--did they stay together, your two friends? Or did time and distance work to inevitably tear them apart?

Emily%202015_zps34rpkjob.jpg

 

"Days in the sun...what I'd give to relive just one. Undo what's done, and bring back the light."

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I do wonder about the first one though--did they stay together, your two friends? Or did time and distance work to inevitably tear them apart?

 

Well, EVENTUALLY yes they broke up, but not from the distance. As luck would have it, they were the topic of another of my poems, which I did for them when they hit their 1 year anniversary with each other... And yes, it is THE Emeric some of you might know.

365

 

365

A simple number

filled with happiness

filled with memories.

 

The happiness never left either your eyes.

You always smiled when even remotely near each other.

Ive been there beside you both

Watching you learn to love each other more.

 

365

You've both grown.

There have been fights

there have been moments to which you both have cried.

 

365

You both make me smile in your own ways

Emeric, with your undying loyalty, humor, and copanionship.

Rosie, with your witty comebacks, nicknames and 'terrifying' glares.

 

You love eachother.

You seem perfect for eachother

Cancel that...

you are perfect for eachother.

I care about you both.

 

Three-Six-Five

 

365 days wirth eachother by your sides.

The start of forever.

 

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I hesitate to post another 'stupid angst-filled sappy' poem, but it really ended up as a good one...

Once in a while

 

Every once in a while, you meet someone special in your life.

Someone who touches your heart and makes you smile from the inside out, from your heart.

Someone to whom you never want to leave your side, for fear of what even a second apart will do to you.

 

Someone who you can confirm you love for, just by watching them smile in front of your eyes.

Someone who seems to be molded to fit in your loving embrace, fitting in your arms perfectly, and for whom trust in you seems to be instantaneous.

 

For me, this past week has been like a dream, full of such perfections in life and love.

It has been full of laughter and smiles, piggyback rides, and bonding between what were once two total strangers.

 

I enjoyed her company, and still do.

I feel I can't see her enough, even when I spend an entire day near her.

In less than a week, I managed to come into her life, and quite literally sweep her off her feet.

 

Her smile is intoxicating, washing all fear and confusion from my head, and replacing it with sheer joy.

I have made a friend in her at least, and if the dream were to continue, something more.

But even so, all dreams must end eventually, but hope carries dreams on forever.

 

She is the one who fits the above things, all by just being herself.

If this dream comes to an end, she will remain in my life, and in my heart.

 

Some would say "You haven't known her long enough to love her, your just reaching out to whoever is there."

To them I say "Then you dont belive in love at first sight as I do"

 

Still others will say "You cant force her to love you"

To them, "And no one can force me to change how I feel"

 

And some might say "You cant steal your friend's girlfriend"

And they are right...

 

So to everyone I say, I still love her as much as I did two days ago, and I don't know what happens next...

Nothing can change the way one feels...

 

Because you become a lucky person...

Once in a while...

 

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Then there's a good number of poems that were written in the dead of night. I have always considered myself a night owl, so sometimes I feel the most at peace during the late evening/early morning hours. Again, you can totally tell this was written during high school...

Who says Bad things will happen

 

Who says bad things will happen,

when the sun goes down.

The night lives on,

with its own life,

its own action.

The sun will rise again,

in a few short hours.

The day will come,

and they will return to their jobs,

return to their cubicles,

return to their annoying co-workers.

But the night is theirs,

free of paperwork,

free of bosses.

Free of people who always use your stapler.

The night offers freedom,

its a social gathering,

of everyone in town.

Its when you can complain,

about your meaningless,

ongoing,

drone of a job.

During the night,

they are in charge.

During the night,

they rule all.

During the day,

their freedoms are lost.

Their minds wander,

from one thought to the other.

They try to focus,

but cant seem to.

They think only of 5-o-clock.

Of when they get to go to their expensive cars,

when they get to get stuck in traffic,

when they get to honk the horn at everyone in their way.

They think of the nights activities.

Of the freedom the night brings.

They are the free ones,

no bedtimes,

no homework,

no teachers,

sounding like Charlie Brown cartoons.

They are free,

between school and family.

They are happy during the night,

when their dreams run free.

But the sun will rise again,

and the cycle begins again....

 

1fE1uLv.png

I ate a hippo. It was delicious.

May the Forth therve you well...

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